Thursday, April 14, 2005

Sex on the beach

That's actually a drink. A Brazilian one I think (atleast the first time I saw it was in a Brazilian bar). And you wonder why Brazil is such a great place! I don't mind drinking that, if it'll make me do that. Seriously, this is one of my dreams. To have sex on the beach in a deserted island. Hopefully that will happen one day.

Being the smart and unique character that she is, Haal pointed to some of our earlier discussions and claimed that any guys discussions always turn into a talk about sex. Jeff, an American wannabe journalist who's learning Arabic, is starting to come out of his protective shell and interact with some real Egyptians. He described me as a sex-obsessed creature. I didn't think it showed, but since its out in the open now, I'd better start blogging about it.

No claims of being a macho man on my part, and no conclusions about my sex life on your part please. I'm speaking my mind here, not my .. [something else]. I think sex obsession could be a good thing. Its a sign of being alive. Yeah, just having sex is enough to be alive. But being obsessed with it, is something else. I think Freud was stupid, and he took it too far. You can be sex-obsessed while putting it in the right perspective, and equally important is to control your libido when it should be under control.

There's one thing that I like more than sex, and that's food. Yes, we eat to live, not live to eat, blah blah blah. But when you eat, you should enjoy it, not do it as a duty. You don't have to eat too much to enjoy it. As a matter of fact, when you eat too much, you end up hating food. But good food is a sign of good life. Good food brings pleasure to a life. I don't know why some people use food in sex? I think that's disgusting. Shouldn't mix two pleasures together, I'll end up distracted by both, and won't enjoy either. Good food and a good partner jealous of each other, spoiling each other; not my definition of fun. That would be a waste. If given the choice between food and sex, I'll choose food first. Have to get my energy, and then sex can be earned.

Why does sex have to be such a bad thing?! It could be if you're having sex for the sex (heck) of it. Without love, and real feelings, this would be just like masturbating. Where's the joy in that. Real joy from sex comes from the joy of having it with the person you love. Have you ever felt that you love your partner so much, just being together is not enough, talking is not enough, hugging and cuddling is not enough. Each of those are endless activities. I could talk forever (literally forever) with the person I love, and its a pleasure, but they're unpractical. Sex is a practical mean of expressing love. You spend time together, it gets endless, you talk, it gets endless, you touch and cuddle, it gets endless, you have sex, snap, that's it! You're both satisfied and relieved. See you in the morning baby. How many people can actually have a decent conversation after sex? can cuddle and hold each other after sex? Its all hypocrisy. You can have another round, but you can't cuddle and talk (clean talk).

The real fun is not in sex itself. Its in everything that surrounds it. Getting turned on, sweet talk, dirty talk, inventing new approaches, new strategies, new adventures; that's fun. Feeling and breathing your partner, integrating and being one with each other is the real fun. Can you do that on your own? No, but you can have sex on your own.

Are men more sexually driven than women? I hope not, and I think not. Each gender just expresses their sexual desires differently. I'll make a claim that most women care more as to who their sexual partner is. That tells me that women are smarter in bed than men, and appreciate sex more. Which tells me that they're more sexual than men. Is it true that most women have to be in love with their sexual partner? If yes, than they're smarter than men in bed, and they get it, they get what sex is about.

34 comments:

Highlander said...

This is what I call a 'blockbuster' post *wink*. What is it with the Egyptian bloggers tonight? Big Pharaoh is discussing 'leilat al dhokla' ( polite translation for the non-arabic speakers is 'wedding night' with emphasis on deflowering) and you fantasize of sex on the beach... LOL. To answer your question, yes most women would have to be in love...

praktike said...

But Mohamed, masturbation *is* sex with someone you love.

Mohammed said...

ummmm
ok, so u started the sex series...
where is the tips and tricks?

Haal said...

Yes, having sex just makes a long story short. Fits our practical, TGV life. Why need to talk, cuddle, hug. You know what you want at the end, so go get it and get done with it.

I think women have to be in love to have sex.But this is only because they just love any one who loves them. So this is not actually a limiting factor.

Hellme said...

If this is a current meme, I'm not playing.

Highlander - it's mating season, which happens in April for some species.

Haal said...

This is too much fun for Thursdays! I think I will be fired for laughing out loud, Hellme!

Mohamed said...

See, everyone is sex obsessed. It hasn't been a few hours and everyone is jumping into the comments already :)

Mohammed: that could turn into a series I guess. This post is where everyone should let out their opressed sexual feelings, not the "I love Cairo" post! No tips and tricks though, I think I'll keep those to myself.

Haal: I'm not replacing talking, hugging and cuddling with sex. I'm saying that those are the real fun, and they're not a long story, they should be an endless story. Don't look down at sex! Look forward to it, and enjoy.. enjoy.

Praktike: suit yourself :)


I'd like to see a woman blog about sex in a joyful/respectful manner.

Reese The Law Girl said...

The thing about some women though is that they don't have to be in love to have great sex.

Scratch that.

All women don't have to be in love to have great sex. Take for example Brad Pitt. I think he's hot and I do not love him. But, if he's a good performer (you know what I'm saying) then I know we would have great sex. Because he is sooooo hottt!!!

Geez, Mohamed now you've got me thinking about sex with Brad Pitt. I'm going to have bad thoughts for the rest of the day. ;)

Mohamed said...

Hehe Reese. Actually all guys believe that, but I like being naive. Plus, if I say otherwise, I'll need a good lawyer to defend me against some vicious women who'd wanna break my neck.

Highlander said...

Haal , Thusday night is supposed to be 'fun' in Middle-East ;), I'm glad I'm currently unemployed because the IT people would have reported me reading this site and my boss would have a cause to fire me for licentious behaviour - oops no pun intended !

praktike said...

Mo, that was a Woody Allen reference.

Do you folks know about this blog? It's pretty, er, unique. Kuwaiti women's rights activism and sexual fantasy blogging rolled into one. I'm told there are lots of Persian-language blogs like that, but obviously I can't read them.

Mohamed said...

That's it. I'm moving over to the Kuwaiti blogosphere. I think I'll mix better with these guys/gals.

Mohamed said...

Hey Praktike, love those quotes by Woody Allen. I think this one pretty much sums up this post:
"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good."

Highlander said...

Praktike & Mohamed, Jewaira is male check here ;)
http://jewairasboudoir.blogspot.com/2005/04/gorgeous.html

But Jewaira xx or xy is fun anyway , you'll enjoy the Kuwaiti blogosphere especially MadM2000

Jewaira said...

Hi Mohamed from Cairo ;)
Interesting topic.
Jewaira, from Kuwait :)

Highlander said...

I revise my earlier opinion, Jewaira is female, just finished reading all her blog archives, and her imagination is wild ..good for you Jewaira ;)

praktike said...

"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good."

That's a good one. If you like that, you should read this short story. Lots of inside jokes. I think you need a good intellectual woman.

Highlander-
Yeah, the trick is that the "I" is not always the same person there.

Highlander said...

Thanks Praktike.

While we are still on this subject check this book it's for the gals but guys can benefit too I'm sure

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0060817402/msn-bookfo/ref%3Dnosim/104-6355466-0193532

ألِف said...

When I read the title, I said hey! At last someone will be telling us a real story ;-)
Next time you're on the beach take a skinny dip..you'll love it..think of it as making love to nature.

Kat said...

Sorry, sex on the beach as a fantasy is nice, but in all practicality (and I hate to be a mood killer) it's kind of..rough...would be a good word.

Sand is a terrible thing to experience under certain conditions.

You ever notice how much collects on your person just swimming or baking?

Imagine rolling in it.

As far as Brad Pitt, maybe, definitely as the bad boy in Thelma and Louise.

Mohammed said...

ok mohamed,
I'm letting out my opressed sexual feelings...

when I love someone... really love someone, having sex with that certain girl isn't the thing that i fantasize about most... it's hugging, kissing and cuddling

while on the other hand if i see some hot chick on the street, sexual fantasies start playing in my head...

Scott from Oregon said...

Sex on the BEACH? You sure have gotten down to the gritty gritty...

Lousy place for sex. Move it out into the water, standing about belly button deep or slightly deeper....

But on the BEACH? Bad fantasy.... Really really bad....

Mohamed said...

Kat and Scott, you seem to be speaking from experience. Don't deny us the pleasure/pain of trying it for ourselves. Scott, I heard that its unhealthy to do it in the water. So be careful there.

Scott from Oregon said...

I would never stand between a man and his sexual fantasy. Sort of like standing between a bull and a ready cow.... May you find out for yourselves where sex is best. Perhaps a clean ocean for the gals. My bet is guys can tolerate a little pollution in these types of situations....

Haal said...

I dont look down at sex. It is ok with me :) I am a little cold I guess, or so I claime!

But the interesting thing for me is again linguistically. If our world doesnt look down on sex, why did they use the F. word to be a curse? Like what the F... and the like! And in arabic, one of the worst curse is something realted to the action F.... I mean, how can we describe an action we 'claime to enjoy' with a word that we use in a degrading way?

Mohamed said...

Glad we cleard that up Haal :)

I don't consider the F-word a curse! When someone tells me "F... you", I say, "thank you".

Haal said...

Oh no! I just treated myself to a little 'sexual scandal'.

Well, you saying thank you doesnt erase the implication of the F. word. It is still a curse, whether you acknowledge it or not.

Pris said...

I have a question. I'm from the States and close friends online now for five years with a man from Cairo. He lived here for two years, so is more liberal than many of his friends. He has two daughters and has told me about courtship practices there, including, dates had to be chaperoned until engaged and the doctors who sew back on hymens before a wedding so the bride isn't 'damaged goods'. My question is who on earth do the men have sex with if the women their age are so protected and having had sex makes them less valuable as a bride??

Jewaira said...

Good question, Pris :)
I would love to hear some male response here.

bloggzy said...

Hey.. you should enable anonymous comments ! i had to make a whole darn account to say:
NONE of you people here get it. sex isn't about 'fun'. tennis is fun. video games is fun. sex isn't about fun. It is about pleasuring to the person you love. That's why people say it's an expression of love. Not because you are having fun... but because your making them feel great.. and that makes you feel great.
But, if you don't love them then you are only having sex with them for your own pleasure. What you said about seeing a pretty woman walking down the street and you start getting sexual fantasies about her.. yes you ARE sex obsessed! not only that but you are turning this woman into an object of your own selfish desires, and by objectifying her you are de-humanising her. So don't talk as if you understand what sex is about.. you still have the mentality of a teenage boy who just hit puberty, but with a better writing style.

Queeny said...

Gosh bloggzy, you totally hit the proverbial nail on the head! I couldn't have said it better myself :)

Anonymous said...

Pris, I wanna hear more ppl giving their insights on that topic. First of all all these so called 'good girls' aren't really good at all, they go out with boys, drink, smoke, and sleep around, and the girls in Egypt feel that once she has done it once, she's 'damaged goods' so she might as well really have fun, since its over for her anyways.

Then comes the pressure to get married, her parents ofcourse think she is 'intact' and would make a great mother and wife, so she gets a suitable 'suitor', and she cant refuse, because she knows its her last chance to get married. It doesnt matter if she likes the man or not as long as he has money to support her and buy her a big house and pay a huge dowry. its 2 nights before the wedding, which is such a huge fiasco its ridiculous, she goes to some dodgy doctor that probably had his practice license rvoked for something horrible like rapping a patient while they were under anasthetics. She gets 'patched up' and as if nothing happens, wedding night she lies motionless, because she doesnt want to seem to be 'experienced' the man does his thing, and then they toss the bloody sheet down for thier parents and family to see, to prove that their daughter was a good girl.

Then what, she lives a life with a man she never knew, and she lives a huge lie, how can you start a marriage with sucha huge lie? and so what if she wasnt a virgin, it doesnt make her a bad person. it's ok for guys to go sleep around and do as they please, but then they expect to marry a virgin, somebody with no experience, the sex im sure would be horrible, with no chemistry, but they dont care cuz they would just go and sleep around like they used to when they were single, and the woman would look the other way not wanting to wreck her home, when it isnt really a home, and she cant say anything because she will always be made to feel guilty by society about her 'shady' past, and that she should be lucky to be married at all. Since obviously a woman can not survive without a husband, that a woman needs a husband to complete her.

PATHETIC!

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Kimberly said...

It doesnt matter if she likes the man or not as long as he has money to support dog collars
her and buy her a big house and pay a huge dowry