Divorce diaries

Hilarious outing. Thursday night, I finish work and pick up my constantly-in-a-divorce-state friend to go out for dinner. He starts complaining about his wife, and describes this long fight with his mother-in-law that ended in a demand for divorce. I think this is like the 70th time or something. His usual dilemma; he'd like to divorce her yesterday before tomorrow, but he'd also like to keep the little girl. Which ofcourse he knows that it will most likely not happen.

Another friend of mine calls me while I'm listening to the latest divorce story. I told her, hey, I'm bringing my friend and coming over to meet you. Both are cool friends, so they were okay in meeting for the first time. Although she was abit worried about meeting a constantly-in-a-divorce-state guy who will probably be depressed, and turn it into a lousy outing, but I knew it would be fun. I only urged my friend to watch his mouth and avoid any foul language infront of the lady.

So we all meet at this Pizza place, which I find nothing good about and don't know why everyone thinks so highly of (both the food and the seating are bad)! I order a large pizza to finish it on my own, and my friend who had a quick dinner at home, orders a medium one. The femme just goes for tonic water. A beauty and two beasts basically. Then they roll. He tells his endless stories about his marriage, and how his wife cannot sleep at night without having a good fight. And she, analyzes him and his parents and his wife and her parents. As long as she's agreeing with him on how his wife is wrong, then he's enjoying it, and as long as she's tough on him, he wants to tell more stories to prove how much of an angel he is. So I had to intervene (considering that I'm always siding with his wife, and he's always hating me for it), and tell the story when he was flirting with a girl and telling her that she was sexy through an SMS, and when his wife saw it and was fuming he told her that the SMS was to me! I also had to tell about his meeting with his other girlfriend in Italy when he was engaged to his wife. So then he had to tell some of my stories to prove I was crazy, like when I jumped off his car because he wouldn't let me out, and when I was fighting with them in the house in Agamy and went running out of the house with two brooms in my hand, a pj pants and a torn t-shirt and came back an hour later, and how I get off my car to curse the guys who throw flyers in your car while you're driving. I think my poor lady friend didn't know all this was coming. The guy said everything, and just stopped short of telling his intimate stories with his wife (thanks God he stopped there).

We're laughing so much, but their eyes start tearing from all the onion chopping going on in the kitchen, so we continue over at the cafe next door. Now that was comfortable, so we get more divorce stories, and our lady friend starts to think that this outing can't be real, and she must be dreaming. She asks my friend jokinly, "so how long have we known each other for?". Then he says there's one more thing she doesn't know about him, "my underwear is size 6", and we all crack. Man, even I didn't know that!

Three hours of constant fun and laughter, and he was actually truly depressed about his marriage, but totally helpless (or so he believes). Two years of a failed marriage, nothing they do works because they're not really trying hard enough and they don't trust one another anymore. He's a stubborn child and a dumb control freak, and she's selfish and insecure who always puts herself ahead of the relationship, that she'll never do what will satisfy him.

We separate at midnight, Cinderella heads home, I drop my friend at the 'ahwa to continue his night, and I head to bed. As my friend is getting out to the 'ahwa he tells me that he had lots of fun, and asks me why her and I are not together!